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发表于 2008-5-26 03:12:22
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We always hear "the rules"
' L0 J U3 |* C9 x$ ^From the female side.
9 Z; r6 i% } \ n5 D aNow here are the rules from the male side.7 g+ \& f( |! i6 V) A
These are our rules!' B5 j2 w3 @! d' q7 l, B0 E5 Y" \# Y
Please note.. these are all numbered "1"
# k- Q7 Y! p1 ^ON PURPOSE!3 Q k G/ A& S/ q0 y1 ^! I7 a3 v
1. Men ARE not mind readers.9 K: _( N* L; v) \* \+ h( j
8 V% x/ E/ D- j1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
# Z" D% ?, S2 a IYou're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.: n: I6 M" c+ R9 J1 S( {# {
We need it up, you need it down.1 M. x( d3 _4 e7 Z9 Y3 E
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down." f5 E7 A4 z, X2 ~; u6 \& w; K* v2 p
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
+ P1 ?: Z# _2 k; ^! C7 b. Jor the changing of the tides.) R9 k/ ?6 S' V. ]) P& h5 c
Let it be.% |3 G) |/ |% {& G4 M6 Q
7 m2 H0 ?2 ?* A% _& `3 Z1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
6 Z" `9 c; Y# z `7 B) o- GAnd no, we are never going to think of it that way.: {5 l4 J2 t7 q0 k
! y0 ^$ O+ h* c' Q8 e. q1. Crying is blackmail." h$ d W; l" p/ z
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1. Ask for what you want.
/ n" C- m! Q, p# K {9 B# pLet us be clear on this one:
' H! E8 t4 ]1 T; d z7 Q) `$ iSubtle hints do not work!+ t# h( c- u/ D# J
Strong hints do not work!5 o0 n1 g7 ?; f1 m( \& v
Obvious hints do not work!. t* A/ F" l( e6 L
Just say it!! ?3 x, A% n3 p. E
" j |3 S% C% p7 D3 f1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do.
! o8 A- r" D: I) x* U9 }Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.9 N0 ?# A( R: G- X2 {# ~* Y( t$ b
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.2 q0 [8 b' v, M; `
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.' W3 f9 Q9 |6 K
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.
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* Q7 p9 U3 Q; o7 y7 F2 }& G1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
$ x& ^3 a3 a6 ` x0 q! N7 |5 g" _Don't ask us.. ]: I5 L6 W& s1 `
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one ..
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1. You can either ask us to do something+ I% g$ C$ g( ^1 P0 t9 k k
Or tell us how you want it done.
1 C2 \! D& o2 W* U, ~Not both./ i! i, ]% q7 I/ R
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
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3 z( r- F1 M9 H# p1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
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- s3 ?/ e$ {, G9 ?6 a1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.5 h7 ~( z7 q9 h0 W
' g4 \7 y8 |% D1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.; E4 C; v' ?0 }: ^5 z$ f+ o
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
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+ ]! P: H8 @0 y6 E* P1. If it itches, it will Be scratched.2 d1 U9 R& F0 Y; K7 S" ~9 u! V
We do that.
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.0 g( o+ b0 o" d/ V3 d: y5 I
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear. u5 H' V, f, z& P+ X. s
' I" C7 w2 c1 _1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine...Really.
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# F4 D" \! s* \; k E* v( N( _9 i* H1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
& d- T) j. @& ~& zor golf.
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1. You have enough clothes., }! ~; F5 a- b6 ]% ^8 R
0 O$ I4 t! m" n9 y1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.2 d, b( J) S8 O5 ~$ P7 |
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. g3 k9 P, u7 z0 ^' nBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. |
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